..err... I mean hookers... yeah hookers.

You see kids, sometimes when a man and a woman... Wait, no that's another explanation.

With each comment I read about this being a "cute" song, I come a little closer to death by a blown out lung, because it never fails to make me laugh. So lets get one thing straight: Koakuma Heaven is NOT a cute song. Its trashy song, a very, very trashy song. As we speak, that hyper techno music blaring from our speakers has our dust covered copies of Vanilla blushing in embarrassment.

Because Koakuma Heaven is about HOOKERS, whores, cheap tricks, scarlet ladies... call them what you want, but that's what this is about. Lets not be silly and start yacking on about this just being about a woman who is a little loose.

Line about a blow job + line about thick wallet, does not = cheap date. Indeed; blow job + thick wallet = VERY EXPENSIVE DATE

If ya' know what I mean. Lots of native speakers have already verified the point, so lets just let that one rest.

Yes indeed, Koakuma Heaven is sung from the perspective of a hooker and a female one too. We know its a woman because Gackt uses "wa" at the end of several words and the pronoun "Uchi". Both are only used by women and children. (and we can safely assume this isn't a child) Then of course there's the drag-tastic cover. ^^

You can read the song lyrics: HERE if you still don't believe me!

Oh and there's been a lot of confusion (amongst overseas fans) over the use of emoticons in the song. I've heard some pretty zany explanations for that, cyber sex being the favorite, but its actually very simple, in fact I bet its the emoticons that clenched it for the Japanese fans that this was a prostitute! You see, even in the red-light distracts of Shinjuku, you're going to have a hard time just walking in and finding a quicky. Oh sure, somebody will give you a naked massage and spray whip cream on you for a few thousand yen, but very few of the women (or men) that you come across in hostess clubs, salons, massage parlors, ect are going to screw you. No, sorry, no dice.

The actual prostitutes do their contact work over the phone. To get in touch with one of them you have to either know someone, who knows them and where they hang out or (as is usually the case) you have to go business card hunting. Yup' business cards.
Just wander over to your nearest shady payphone booth and grab one of the many little cards (often complete with photo) plastered on the inner walls and give them a call! Or rather a text. Most propositions are made via text message and particular emoticons are often used
as codes: the <3 heart being the favorite.

-and of course our favorite ex-host would know all about that. ^.-